October 7th, 2006
Well, that’s about done it for me, I absolutely have to become a millionaire now so that I can embark on lunar adventures, the beauty of it all is that I can get it all for cheaper given the strength of the UK currency. I reckon this is probably the coolest thing I have ever seen for sale online so I think I might add it as the number one item on my non existent wish list.
Richard Branson deserves a hat tip bigger than any other available, this is truely the dogs nuts Check out stellar travels for sale at Neiman Marcus Online and feel free to take me with you for telling you about it.
You can find out more at Virgin Galactic which deserves another hat tip for probably the best ever URL purchased!
October 6th, 2006
Well I don’t know about you but I love super heroes however there have to be thousands of ways to make fun of them via the medium of bad jokes hence this weeks theme. My main image is of one of my favourite TV shows ever but I have decided that my joke will have to be about a member of the X-Men.
Q: How can you tell there’s been a member of the X-Men in your Fridge?
A: Claw marks in your butter.
October 3rd, 2006
This is a definitely a picture worth sharing which I found by accident this morning, hope it makes you think that little bit more creative for the day. It certainly has me ready for action!
September 29th, 2006
Okay, time to mash it up with some film humor on this weeks Bad Joke Friday. I have to be quick with this post though so please forgive me… Have fun! I will take part as soon as I get a chance… very busy!
Q: Why is Darth Vader always late?
A: LORD Knows
September 28th, 2006
I ended up having a bit of a cruise online tonight and stumbled across this, it made me chuckle so I thought I would share.
I am so looking forward to getting a nice shiny Wii when they come out, I have fought and won a desparate battle with an urge to go out and buy and XBOX 360 but the Wii just looks like so much more fun.
Anyone else got any cool Wii video’s to share?
September 20th, 2006
“Stop it… Leave me alone!” said Jonny. He and a couple of his friends stayed on the corner of “Knuckle Ridge” and every day at 2 o’clock without fail, they would find themselves burning in some sort of acid rain. They were beginning to get used to it but this doesn’t mean they actually enjoyed it. Jonny was getting really upset because he was getting smaller and smaller as time went on, this was quite disturbing as even before the acid showers started his friends used to tease him and call him “shorty” or “gads you’re hairy”.
One day (I think it was a Tuesday) Jonny was out in his garden hanging out his washing when bang on 2pm the showers started. The shrinking was never an immediate thing so (pull)Jonny took in his washing before anything too drastic happened(/pull).
Seeing as there was no point in going outside for the next little while, Jonny sat down to a nice cup of tea and pondered for a while. Pondering was never one of Jonny’s strong points but seeing as it was raining he figured he would give it a bash anyway. By the time Jonny had finished pondering his tea was cold, he had a really nasty cramp all over and to top it off, someone had snuck in and shaved his eyebrows 1 whilst he was busy concentrating on his ponder.
For the first time in a long time, despite the cold tea, cramp and lack of eyebrows, Jonny realised that his ponder hadn’t been in vain… he had managed to ponder to not one but two conclusions! One being that living where he does he is constanly affected by the rain, the second being that he hated the expression “gads you’re hairy…”
After finally managing to ponder to a conclusion, or two as the case may be, Jonny decided he might actually have to see if by pondering he could find out what that meant. Needless to say that just because he came to more than one conclusion, it didn’t mean he was going to be able to do it again and predictably his attempts were fruitless.
Despite Jonny’s failure to come up with a third conclusion, the remains of the first two were more than fresh in his mind and he found himself with a distinct urge to do something about it. he was just away to engage once again in the process of deep thought when his flatmate appeared to the greeting of “gads you’re hairy Jonny… have you had a trim? You’re looking smaller than usual…”
Poor Jonny had his concentration and what was left of his self esteem shattered in an instant. This did however have a positive effect, as that night Jonny went missing and to this day his flatmates have heard neither head nor tail of him. There are rumors floating around that he has found a nice location in “Foot Arch Square”, but these are completely unfounded as warts are warts after all and although to my knowledge they are unable to get up and leave, I could well be completely wrong. Just like Jonny’s flatmates, I too am at a complete loss as to where he went!
Maybe he was frozen off when no-one was looking, maybe he shrank away to nothing in an extra heavy shower of the 2 o’clock variety or maybe there’s a lot more to warts than meets the eye, maybe he did pack his bags and head for company among more friendly types such as verukas… After all, this wart did have a name and that’s a start…
September 15th, 2006
This is a post that could go on forever but I figured it was worthy of writing a little about seeing as it seems to be taking up my time at the moment. Now I know that might sound funny that getting organised is taking up time but I believe I am making the right moves to being way more productive in both my home and business life. What I do now will change the way I do everything in future which is something I am really really excited about.
For a long time I have rattled about paper work and have been known to procrastinate from time to time but as I am getting more and more client work in, I realised that having the right setup would help me 10 fold in getting things done. So what have I done so far?
- Well, for a start I blew off trying to get a virtual machine running under Linux so I could run both Windows 2000 Pro & Ubuntu on one machine, it was eating up time and quite frankly my time is better spent. I bought a KVM switch which allows me to run more than one computer through the same keyboard, monitor and mouse… Probably the best purchase I have made in the last year!
- I bought a copy of Getting Things Done by David Allen which is probably my second best purchase this year!
- I bought myself 2 sets of paper processing trays, one for home, one for business. I am currently operating in a relatively small space so have had to choose my office components relatively carefully. These units contain 3 drawers each which I am using for incoming files, incubator files and outgoing files.
- I have a filing cabinet for archiving once files leave my working trays.
- I also bought a calander by week with days broken into segments of 5 which translates to 5 x 1.5hr slots which has allowed me to have a permanently visual representation of my week ahead.
- Got a sketch pad for scribbling visual ideas.
- Got a notepad for scribbling notes.
- Got my faithful post it notes.
- I have arranged getting my loft all floored with a purpose built work area complete with booby traps & good insulation for sound so noone can hassle me. This is probably the most important one for me as it will allow me to lock down into work mode and only come down the hole at lunch times and for 1 quick break in the morning and 1 in the afternoon.
What am I going to do next?
- Put into practice a work flow model that works for me (Everyones mind works differently).
- Look into getting a RAID enabled file server on the go.
- Decide on my business backup model.
- Get a Skype In number and buy a Skype Phone for my office instead of going down hiring an 0870 number and redirecting it.
- I am toying with setting up a separate pay as you go mobile phone for my on the move business as well, this way everything is separate from my personal bills.
- Send off all my info to get a P.O. Box for my business.
- Buy a white board as it’ll mean less paper!
- FINISH The books I am reading about Getting Things Done & Money being my friend.
What am I really gonna do when I get my office?
- Buy an XBOX 360 & a Wii and call it a business expense.
- I’m sure High Definition Television is compulsary for businesses in the UK.
- 30″ Monitor sounds like it might be necessary.
- Set up all my Starwars toys.
- Make a dedicated Steel Batallion corner!
- Make my own beer.
- Increasing my toy collection is important for inspirational purposes…
Okay… That is some of the stuff I have been doing and plan to do, what do you do to make your day easier?
September 1st, 2006
Here is a subject that I am sure many of you have close to your heart and seeing as I am wrestling with mine this morning I thought it might make a good topic for some humor. Whether it be about computer woes, jokes made up about code or ripping into a sys admin then make them up and spit them out as thats what this is for…
I will start you off with a joke based on the awesome modded PC case above:
Q: What do you call someone who manages computerised toilets?
A: A Systerns Administrator
Have fun folks!
August 28th, 2006
I have written so much waffle recently about getting stuff done I figured I would lighten it up with a little poem seeing as I had a few words rattling about in my head that needed to get out. I’ll tell you something for nothing though, productivity is a hard word to finish on lol… Here goes …
***
Cut the crap
just get it done
that’s what they call productivity
Closing a deal
or a baby in womb
that’s what they call productivity
For I have no time
to blether and rhyme
but also this is productivity
’cause if you produce
instead of reduce
you can put it all down to productivity
***
August 25th, 2006
For many years space has been the subject of many a joke and I figured that we could take a stab at it here and add to this already expanding universe of space related jokes. Please don’t just regurgitate jokes you have heard before as there is no fun in that, make ‘em up is always soooo much more fun. Just remember that if you are making a play on works make sure they are spocken properly otherwise U‘ll be Fount Out…
Man this could get really bad on my part, I kinda went nuts last week because I hadn’t had a chance to blog much due to work commitments, I managed to finish my business plan(et) though and get it out there and I am going to klingon to the fact that I am allowed to tell such terrible jokes because this website does actually fall outwith intergalatic juristiction.
Oh well, on that note I will leave you to it but before I go I usually start you off with one of my own, well this time I will just take a jibe at one unfortunate spacemans hairdo!
